Life Challenges and Personality Complexes

Normally my child wakes me up shortly after 7 am and after I force-cuddle him for an hour we get up and go about our day. Tuesdays mean there is a playgroup at my MFRC (Military Family Resource Centre) first thing in the morning but unfortunately my child has decided Tuesday is the perfect day to sleep in forever and be a grumpy-guss.

It sucks because my husband is gone this week for work and I was looking forward to some adult contact. I do have something planned for tomorrow so that WILL happen come hell or high water.

Because he’s gone I have extra time to work on my writing. Right now I’m rereading TAK so that I can get back into my groove. It’s good because I can do some light editing while I do it.

I’d read it on my tablet during the day but I STILL don’t have a charger for my tablet. At this rate I’m going to have to ask for it for Christmas.

Which brings me to my personality complex.

I’m very much the kind of person where I feel like I must be able to do everything myself or else I am a poor excuse for human.

Examples:

When my husband is gone I NEVER ask for help. I don’t ask for breaks, help cleaning my house or making meals. It’s easier to be like that now because I don’t have any friends here in my new place. And my in-laws are an hour away so asking them for anything is out of the question.

My mother-in-law recently asked me what I wanted for my birthday. I told her gift cards from Amazon are fine. Are there other things I want? Of course. But they are expensive things and I’ll be damned before I ask for them as a gift. If I can’t afford them, I won’t own them.

I also have this complex where I MUST be able to do everything on my own. This means going to school, raising my children, working and maintaining my house. I don’t like asking for help. If I can’t handle my child during an appointment, I must be a bad mother. If I can’t work and raise my children and look after my husband I must be a bad wife.

Such stupid complexes.

But that’s the way I work. Speaking of which, I should help my son with this level of Angry Birds before he breaks the iPad.

Posted by Sarah Jayne

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