The Reason for my Madness

I’m sure everyone has their own reasons for why they write and for why they write the things they do.

I’m going to share the reasons why I do what I do.

I’ve been writing since I was about thirteen. I started writing in a journal to help me cope with some emotional and psychological stress I was experiencing in my family life. Since I was thirteen and living in rural Ontario, there was only so much help and support I could get, or knew to try and access, so I dealt with things the best way I knew how: I escaped into reading and writing.

I devoured every sort of book I could find. Stephen King, John Saul, V.C. Andrews, R.L. Stein, Guy Gavriel Kay. It didn’t matter the genre although I had a penchant for horror or fantasy.

In my journal I would lament about my struggle with life, with my family, with myself. Looking back it was a torturous time and I only hope that my own children never feel that way. Or if they do, it doesn’t last long and they feel comfortable talking to myself or my husband about it.

I started writing short stories. Everything was horror. People died left, right, and centre. Usually I modeled characters after people who made me feel insignificant or worthless and unceremoniously knocked them off in my stories.

I can’t write ‘normal’ fiction. There has to be magic, there has to be fantasy, there has to be some sort of other-worldlyness or else I can’t connect or identify with the characters I’m creating.

As I’m editing more and more for Black & Red I ran across the first character I ever created to be mentally unbalanced. It was a huge thing for me as I drew upon a lot of what I had experienced to create this persona.

The story to follow Black & Red touches more on power-insanity than this one. In this story, the character has been belittled, under-valued, and basically shunned by society so it was something I could identify with a lot.

I can probably go more into this later, if I remember 🙂 Otherwise, happy writing and happy editing to all those out there!

Posted by Sarah Jayne

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