I will float here
Empty of substance
Surrounded by a false warmth.
The world
My current world
Is lacking.
I teeter between grief and madness.
Pain and delirium.
Agony and strife.
The shattered pieces
Of my strength
Are littered at my feet.
The breaking point was breached.
Yet it will be rebuilt.
As I lie here.
Surrounded by the false warmth
As the tiny pieces of my soul
Refill my empty cup.
The sharp crack
Of your destruction
Rings in the muted silence
Like a shot.
My presence
In this pure white wonderland
Is punctuated
By the sound of your demise
As I crush your fragile existence
Beneath my feet.
When it’s warm enough
To snow
The ground becomes covered
In a blanket of
Purity.
All imperfections are hidden
As the world becomes equal.
The blanket mutes the sounds
Of the city
Of nature
Of my own mind
As I blankly stand in the falling peace
And regain comfort over
Myself.
My heavy feet
Trod over your
Fragile form.
The satisfying crunch
That rings out from beneath my heels
Is the sound of your final protest
From your decaying self.
Lying awake
Too dark to see the ceiling.
Thoughts swirling in my mind
While my eyes see nothing.
I can’t focus
On anything
To save my life.
There is no respite
For the wicked.
I will sleep
When I am
Dead.
The jealousy I feel
When I see you in various stages of
Undress
Burns within my chest.
Your accessories long tossed away
As you change from gold, to red, to muddy brown.
Discarding your leaves you lay yourself bare.
Exposed to the gentle breeze
That is laced with ice
As if to foretell
What is to come.
If scars can tell stories
Lord
My body is covered with an adventure
Of epic proportions.
Every good actress knows
You don’t cry once the makeup is on.
You don’t break character no matter how much it hurts.
Smile through the pain
And swallow your tears.
For this stage is vast and grand.
No one must know
That you are merely the understudy
In your own life.
It’s overwhelming.
The urge to put on the mask;
To dance to the fake song
That screams in my mind.
The desire to wriggle
Out of my very skin
And dress up as another being.
Fake smiles to go around
And artificial happiness for days.
Slowly
As the sun creeps across the sky
And the moon hangs in an empty darkness
I am reminded of the fractures
In my mortality.
