money issues

Snow, Snow, Snow!

Here in Manitoba, Canada we laugh when Spring starts to appear. Like most places in Canada March seems to herald in a new season. Snow starts to melt, the sun shines and temperatures rise. Lots of people discard their parkas or other winter coats in favour of lighter Spring jackets and sweaters. There are even people who start wearing shorts! I know 10°C is warm, but come on!

But in Manitoba, we know better. We know this is just a ruse, a trick. It’s not actually Spring yet. We’ve gotten a dumping of snow in May for crying out loud! When I lived in Alberta, it was much the same. I haven’t lived in Saskatchewan before, but since it’s sandwiched between the two, I imagine it’s similar.

So it was no surprise when a fresh, crisp blanket of white greeted me this morning. Flakes were falling gently in the air. Ah, snow. It’s snowing again and we’re liable to get another 2-4cm today.

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My eldest son was less than impressed. He wanted the green grass and the puddles to come back. Driving to work this morning had us going through 2 intersections. Such is life here.

On a good note, do you all remember that money issue I’ve been bitching about for the last seven months? Of course you do! If there’s anything I do well, it’s complain.

Yesterday afternoon the bank called my husband to inform him that the cheque had been received. Within an hour, it was showing in our account. FINALLY! FINALLY! The money has been received. I no longer have to worry about buying groceries this weekend. I don’t have to worry about paying my mortgage. I don’t have to worry about being able to afford the new socks my kid so desperately needs.

I have been offered lots of support in terms of money to fill the gaps while we were waiting for this goddamn payout. Friends, family, friends that are basically family. While I appreciate it all, I have an extreme aversion to borrowing money. I do not like owing people money. I don’t like owing even a dollar to someone. Being indebted to someone makes me go into extreme anxiety-mode.

I’ve associated owing money to someone as basically giving that person rights  to your life. Like blood money. My rational brain thinks this thought-process is ridiculous. My irrational brain tends to be a bit louder and is like “whaaaaa? NO!”

Other good news is that we are now able to afford those tiny extras we’ve been waiting on. I can paint the office and purchase one of the last pieces of furniture. We paid off my student loan, I paid off the credit card, I repaid my in-laws (they bought us the desk for the office. I’ve been in agony ever since). My husband was able to order the new toy he wanted. Once the credit card recovers from its workout I’ll pay it off again and put the rest of  the money in savings like I planned.

Things are finally looking up. The last seven months have been hell and stress. Things have been tense and no one was happy. Now we can focus on being a family again. My husband and I can afford to go on a date. It is better now. Much better.

Posted by Sarah Jayne in Rantings, 0 comments

One Step Forward

It’s been pretty rough in my neck of the woods lately. Money issues have been the biggest bane of my existence but it seems these problems are getting organized now.

Things they don’t tell you about having a family: it’s goddamn expensive. Oh, that’s common knowledge? Is it really? I can’t say I was expecting to be paying over $1000 a month for someone to look after my children so that I could work. I can’t say I was expecting diapers to cost almost $40 a box with wipes not that far behind. I can’t say I was expecting my kids to go through phases where all they want to eat is cereal or yogurt. Did you know that the individual yogurts that are aimed at kids are almost $4 for 6 of them? I’ve tried buying the big tubs of flavoured yogurt to save some bucks since they eat it so much but the eldest freaks out over the bits of fruit in his.

*SIGH*

This is my life and these are my kids. I am complaining, but there’s not much that can be done right now. We’re currently a majorly single-family income since my husband is in school full time. The youngest needs full time care and the eldest will be in grade 1 in 8 months so the costs for his care will lessen. There’s a lot of pressure put on families. All kinds of families. Sometimes it can be unbearable but we soldier through.

The sleepless nights because you worry something is wrong with your kids or where the grocery money is going to come from.

But as I said, things are getting better. Yesterday my dayhome was closed because my poor dayhome provider was sick. We’ve been with her for almost a year and this is the first time she’s taken a sick day. She clearly needed it. So I tried to enjoy some time with my littlest guy while trying to do some work. The work thing didn’t work out so well and then he decided he wanted nothing to do with me. I hate this phase. I’m the kind of mum that wants the hugs and the cuddles forever.

The days go by and I can only take them one step at a time. It is not good to run, especially when you don’t know the terrain. I don’t want to fall on my face. I do that enough as it is.

In reducing costs I’m going to stop going to kickboxing. With my husbands work schedule I’m paying for classes and I’m not able to attend. I’m considering purchasing a 10 class pass once that money comes in since I got brand new gloves that I love for Christmas. I will still use them, even if I just do it on my own at home. I could get a heavy bag and do my own classes. It’s still a work out. I know what I’m doing now so that helps.

Once the money comes in I need to go to yoga. Since it’s going to cost a bit extra than the gift I was given for this particular studio I’ve been waiting for the moolah before I attend a class.

I’ve also been looking into the different volunteering options for when I am ready/able to get back into that.

But like I said, one step at a time.

In the meantime, I’ll enjoy being serenaded by my husbands horrible rendition of “Bad Blood” (which, in my opinion, is a terrible song anyway)

Posted by Sarah Jayne in Rantings, 0 comments

The Benefits of Pregnancy Brain

Even though I haven’t actually written anything on my next story, I have definitely had a lot of inspirational, crazy pregnancy dreams. Every now and then I get flashes of certain scenes and I’m like: “WOW! That would so work” or “I never thought of showing that raw emotion before. This will do it perfectly”.

I’ve STILL yet to replace my charging cable for my tablet so that is really holding things back. Plus, being a mom kind of puts the breaks on anything involving just myself. I either don’t have the time, I am dead tired from gestating and chasing a 3 year-old, or I have other life things to worry about.

The major worries I had were involving money (of course!) and whether or not I would be able to go back to school next year. I know I said before that I was not going to go to school, but when you plan and scrimp and save for something for YEARS it’s really hard to give it up. Since we got some money back from our move my money issues are a lot lighter now. Now I have other concerns, like child care. I’m going to apply to school and submit all my transcripts and documents for assessment. I’m going to cross my fingers, toes, eyes, and legs that there will be a spot in the daycare for my Hatchling and that there is before/after school care for my son so that I can put him in Pre-School. These are the issues parents face.

IF there is no child care, then that means I need to find an evening/weekend job. That means any schooling I do MUST be online. When I met with the academic advisor at the University she mentioned that they were hoping to offer more of the courses online next year, so I’m hoping for that. This first year is just picking up those extra 18 credits in History so that I have a second teachable. That can be done online. I can use the Occasional Child Care offered at the centre by my house to do school work and have a break from the kids if I need to, especially if I’m working in the evening. It’ll be tight and I might get a little overwhelmed, but I can do it.

In the meantime, I will enjoy the strange dreams my pregnancy is causing. I’ve met with an OB/GYN and we’ve decided to go with another c-section for this little Hatchling. After weight the pros, cons, risks etc I made the choice that this would be the best route. It’s also convenient in planning the care for my 3 year-old, my husband arranging the last day of his work, AND I’m going to get them to obliterate my tubes while they’re in there.

Some people have told me that I’m very cold for deciding to tie my tubes at ‘such a young age’ and ‘are you sure?????’

First of all, I’m (almost) thirty years old. To me, that is old enough to stop having children. I was planning on having my tubes tied if I wasn’t pregnant this year anyway. If I want to go to school and get my Masters, I will not be able to do that with 3+ kids.

Second of all, kids are expensive. In order to provide a certain standard of living for my children we need to be cost-effective. I grew up in poverty and I do not want that for my children. It might not have been ghetto-poverty, but it was poverty enough that worrying about food and housing was a concern. I want my children to be able to go to University or College or Trade School or whatever without stressing about cost. Yes, my children will have to work for their futures, but if I can make the burden a little lighter, then I want to. I don’t want my children worrying about getting work so that they can support the household. I don’t want my children basing their choices for their futures around what the family needs. My husband’s sister has been living in England for a number of years and a part of me is jealous that she was able to make that decision and live the life she wants. It’s awesome and I want my kids to be able to make that choice as well.

But I am going ooooooon and oooooooooooon. I am also blaming this on the pregnancy hormones.

Now I will put my laptop away as my son is very keen on getting me to help him defeat this level of Angry Birds and I have a baby nursery to organize before I start making lunch 🙂

 

PS –> Thank you for all my followers being so patient with me! I know my posts have dropped quite a bit. I’m working out a new routine but they will probably drop again once the Hatchling is born. Please be patient with me! And thanks for reading!

Posted by Sarah Jayne in Rantings, 0 comments