working parents


Happy Monday everyone!

Does anyone dislike Mondays as much as I do? I wouldn’t say I hate them because there are some Mondays that I actually enjoy. Like the first Monday in a vacation. Or a Monday where a movie or game comes out. Mostly though, I hate Mondays.

My kids have been little energy suckers this weekend. My eldest was pretty funny though. He said some funny things. His gems include: “Grampy is 20 30 THOUSAND years old and he is so big he became a giant and if he is not careful he will crush us.” Another really good one is: “You guys! I TOLD you! Everything is not real!” (Pretty deep for a 5 year old). My personal favourite is: “You’re so great. I’m so proud of you! You’re a genius!” which is what I was told while receiving a great big hug because I told him he could have a cookie.

He really seemed to be on a roll this weekend, that’s for sure. He says most of these things with the most serious face I’ve ever seen on a kid.

While his younger brother isn’t spouting profound statements, he’s causing trouble in his own way. For some reason, this kid likes to strip his pants and his diaper off when he’s in bed. The shirt usually stays on, but he’ll be nekkid from the waist down. And since he doesn’t have mastery over his bladder at 2 years old, this causes him to wake up screaming once he realizes he’s peed his bed. We had things under control for a bit by sticking him in this old onesie we had that is footless. The thing is way too small but his legs and arms could stick out so things were fine. It was done up with a zipper and he hadn’t touched it for a few weeks. Well, of course, the other day he unzipped it, and while it was still on him, ripped off the diaper and tossed it over the side of the crib.

I am grateful that the diapers are empty when he tosses them and that he’s just peeing everywhere instead of something else. But come on! Keep your damn clothes on, kid! WE put his diaper on backwards on Friday and things seemed to be okay. My husband went off to work and *BAM* at 9:00pm the little sucker started screaming because he was wet and naked. The poor little guy. I went into his room and stripped him down. I brought him upstairs to give him a warm sponge bath since I didn’t want to wake him up too much by running the tub. Got him back into some clothes and thought I would rock with him in his chair until he fell asleep before I put him to bed. We rocked for about half an hour before I decided I was also tired and sleeping in that chair wasn’t going to do my any favours. So I took him to my bed and that’s where my husband found us when he came home from work. Aaaaaand my kid was wide awake. Needless to say, it was not a fun night.

We also tried taping his diaper on with electrical tape on Saturday night. He still managed to rip the diaper off. Putting the onesie on backwards was not an option because the collar was too tight. So last night we put the diaper on backwards and used packing tape to cover the tabs and the seams. While he was pantless this morning, HE HAD HIS DIAPER ON! Mission accomplished. For the time being.

In other news, we’re still waiting on the payout. It didn’t come on Friday like I was really hoping to. My tablet has also decided that connecting to the wi-fi and GMail is optional which is really annoying.

I also watched the music video for “Turn Down For What”. Watch it. But not at work.


Posted by Sarah Jayne in Rantings, 0 comments

Confessions of a Working Parent: Lack of Time

There is never enough time in a day.

We get up at 6:30am, well, really get up at 6:45am but who’s paying attention.

Hurry hurry. Shower, dry hair. Get dressed. Feed kids. Wait, did we get both of them up? Could you eat any faster? No, we don’t have time for your meltdown over the fact that your sandwich is only in 2 triangles and not 17 billion.

Moving faster and faster. Inhale that cereal/oatmeal/milk/whatever the hell we gave you.

I don’t eat breakfast.

Are you done? Good. It’s time for shoes. Stop pushing your brother. Stop trying to smack each other in the head. Get your boots on. Get your coat on. Where are your mitts? Did you grab your bag? Don’t forget your lunch!

Out the door. Let’s hurry to the car/truck. Get in! Get in! Hold still while I buckle you. Yes, your bag is in the back. No, your brother is going with Dad like he has been every day for the past two months.

Through the inane jabbering, the stupid noises, the crazy parenting we make it out the door. Rush to the daycare. Basically throw the kid into the fray. No, I do not have time to sit and watch as you move slowly like molasses to take your outdoor stuff off and put your indoor stuff on. I have to go to work. Now.

Hurry back to the truck. Get to work to sit at a computer all day. Worry about money. Worry about school and kids and supper! What the hell are we eating tonight?!

Here comes 4:30pm. Rush out the door. Rush to the daycare to be greeted by a meltdown because he doesn’t want to go home. Screaming and crying now. Please just get your bag. We need to go home. There is supper to be made/eaten. Baths to be had.

Roll up to the house and unceremoniously dump everything outside the truck and rush inside. Please hurry up and take your boots off already. Grab your lunch bag. It needs washing.

Hurry up and eat. Hurry up and put your dishes away.

Hurry up.

One kid goes to bed and the other demands all attention. Still no rest. Finally, big one goes to bed. There is now 2 hours left before parents need to go to bed.

Where is the time?   Where is the ease? It’s rush, rush, rush. I am so mentally, physically, emotionally exhausted. There is no ‘me’ time. There is no ‘parent’ time.

A babysitter? Have you heard how much those things cost?

It’ll get better. it has to. Time management may need to be revisited.

But honestly. Make my workday just 2 hours shorter and life would be so much easier.

Posted by Sarah Jayne in Rantings, 0 comments

The 'Mom Guilts'

Today, I find myself suffering from a supreme case of the ‘mom guilts’. I’m sure “Dad Guilts” exist as well, but I’m a Mom so for the purpose of this post I will refer to this feeling as the ‘mom guilts’. (Yes, I am well aware that ‘guilts’ isn’t actually a word).

I have two children. One will be five years old in May and the other is just 15 months old.

For various reasons, I have been working since my youngest was 3 months old. It was mainly evenings and weekends until September when I returned to work full time. As such, I have this sense of guilt that I have abandoned my youngest son.

I have held my current position since December 29, 2014. I have yet to receive a full pay cheque. Between day home issues, family illness and child illness I haven’t been able to put in a full two weeks of work. This week, I am extremely close! After today I have just one more day!

My youngest and I have been suffering from a head-cold for the past few days. Starting yesterday he was a bit warm. Nothing too serious. I took his temperature and it remained under the fever threshold. Other than being grumpy, I thought he was fine. He has this cold plus his two front teeth are coming in. It’s a given he’ll be grumpy in that situation. We went about our morning as usual and I noticed he was a bit more clingy than usual. That is usually a sign of impending illness. But as a working mother, I took him to the day home and went to work anyway. It was at this time that the small pangs of ‘mom guilt’ started to grow.

At about lunch time I got a message from my day home provider. My youngest was warm and wouldn’t stop crying. Just kept crying for an hour. Nothing she could do would calm him down. Cue the swelling of the ‘mom guilts’. After some discussion we agreed to give him some baby advil and if it didn’t get better she would let me know.

It didn’t get better.

I ended up having to dispatch my husband because I have been trying so hard to get a full pay cheque at this job I didn’t want to risk losing time. Cue the excessive swelling of the ‘mom guilts’. I work a half day tomorrow but I have to get our dog licensed with the city and register my eldest for Kindergarten because NONE of these things can be done outside regular Monday-Friday 9-5 hours WHICH IS WHEN I WORK and all of these things must be done face to face. Nothing by mail, over the phone, or online.

I also worked my other job last night. Because I am a crazy person and I work two jobs. So there I am, working away, while thinking of my poor little son and my poor husband and the undoubtedly horrible situation. At this point the ‘mom guilts’ are so big and insane that I can barely stand it. I rush home from work and the kids are both in bed and my husband is obviously worn out and he too is suffering from the ‘leaving-work-early’ guilts’.

Last night my poor little son was up every hour. At 4:30am he was definitely up. His little body was on fire and he was so upset. Thermometer said he didn’t have a fever but he was not normal. He had poor little shivers and that little suck in of breath that happens when they are too exhausted to fully cry. We gave him the last of the advil we had and let him sleep in bed with us. My husband called in to work and he is home with the kids as I sit in my office, consumed by the ‘mom guilts’.

I’m sure other parents have felt this way. We feel terrible when we can’t be there for our children, especially when they are suffering. Especially as the mum where I feel it is my job to be that nurturing provider of safety. I am glad my boys are very attached to their dad right now. But it makes me sad that they don’t seem to miss me even a little bit. I feel horrible that I’m putting my job before my kids, or at least it feels that way. The fact that both boys would prefer to cuddle their Dad and not me also makes me feel like I failed some secret test somewhere that grades my performance skills as a mum.

Maybe it’s just been a bad year so far.

It’ll get better, right?

Posted by Sarah Jayne in Rantings, 0 comments